The perfect storm

I crashed to the bed as usual as the other days to accompany the beautiful night which showered limitless cold golden rays. This planet is definitely gifted to have a permanent investor to shower the gold, only to get the pollution in return. The earth bowl needs more moon like souls, which will fill the world with happiness and joy; where equality valued as gold; sharing as diamond; overwhelming quality attitude. My mind ran a thought race to win the sleep, but my eyelids refused my mind and closed with shyness. My mind fought furiously and tried to lift my eyelids, this time with the support of dreams filled with racy thrillers, romances, fantasies and a bit of a super heroism. Uff, it is already 2 am.

It was a long fight. I miserably failed in convincing them both, not able to bear my failure, I got up from my bed. Damn, I very badly need a sleep, like a baby. When was the last time I managed that? hmmmm, yeah @ the time of my sister's marriage. What an occasion that was, truly a storm which took us for an enthralling experience. It was years ago, but it feels like yesterday.

"Kari, are you done with the marriage shopping for Vasanth? You lazy duck, why dont you finish it off?" My mom screamed in the morning. This has almost become my wake up call everyday. My Dad's turn now, "Idiot, you are the best man for Vasanth in the marriage, you are proving it otherwise. Hurry up".

Without a surprise, weeks of shopping for Vasanth ended just hours before the big occasion. It was my job to make Vasanth look smart. Smart eh?, that word always kept a long distance from me since I was born, but I can't give up on my ego, can I? After all, I am Vasanth's best man in the marriage. I have lined up the party wears, suits, shirts, T-shirts, shoes, slippers & belts to compete with each other to load Vasanth's smartness, but is that enough? hmm... something was missing, yeah, that is it, a glow, a glow in Vasanth's face was missing. A long nice facial did the job. After 3 hours, when it was all over, I realised that it was too late and I missed to do my facial. Damn.

My parents have made all the arrangements @ the marriage hall and waiting for me to join them to greet and welcome the guests. They were losing their patience on me. "Where the hell is he?" My dad yelled, "Vasanth's family has left their home, they could be here any minute, where the hell is he?"

My aunt Selvi agreed to do a quick facial for me. The true colors of the facial would only be visible after 2 days. I was too late, but I hoped that it would atleast hide my 3 sleepless nights (blame it on the marriage arrangements) from my face. The time was running out, it did not let me think about anything. My aunt did a crash course in facial on my face. Thanks aunty.

Panneer uncle was losing his patience, called me. "Where are you? The groom's family could be here any time, hurry up. We also have to pick up people from the bus stop since they don't know where the marriage hall is". Nataraj uncle called, "Kari, we need to buy few things for the chef to prepare the food, hurry up". Nagaraj uncle called, "Kari, my friends wants to refresh @ the hotel, can you show them the hotel?". My aunt called, "Kari, can you please get a garland for the bride, we forgot". My friends called....

I was driving crazy with the facial mask on, in the roads of Coimbatore with my cousin Dilip covering my back. My mission: Go home, clean up the facial, dress up and get to the marriage hall before Vasanth's family arrives. It needs 60 mins, but I had only 5. Many on the road would have thought, I must be a crazy freak driving with some kind of mask on. I managed to scare my relatives @ my home as well.

Guests, who were waiting for me to pick them up got fed up and made their own way to the marriage hall with frustration, which boosted the anger of my parents and uncle. They were fuming like the Sun and waiting for my arrival to burst. More the time passed, closer the groom's family was to the marriage hall. Dad, uncles, aunts and friends dialled my number again.

I had to shhusshh the mobile for a while. I was in the urge to complete my mission. I sat on my bike and ignited the engine. "Kari, your mustache is not well aligned", my friend Rama told. God dammit! I panicked. Oh boy, the mirror agreed with Rama. Scissors trimmed the error, it was done in a rush, relatives everywhere, never got a private place, even if I had one, the tension did not let me feel so. Outcome: I almost removed my entire mushtache. Crap.

Dad and uncle were busy in the kitchen. Mom was busy decorating the reception. I ran into the groom's room, Thank God, Vasanth's family was not there yet. Phew. Tried to dress up, I was just half dressed, but my uncle dragged me to the reception to welcome Vasanth's family. After the welcome ceremony, I realised that I did not zip my trousers, Whoooops. The moment which I will never forget in my life time.

Guests started pouring to the marriage hall; We expected around 1500 people; Entire family were in full swing to attend them; In a while everyone will want to see the couple, have food and leave. Again my mobile buzzed. "Is Vasanth ready yet?" my uncle shouted. The blame rockets started flying all over the hall carrying my name for the delay.



I helped Vasanth to dress up; the bride was busy with the make up; while waiting for the bride I tried to setup my laptop for the slideshow planned, which let me down in a big time. After a long fight, with huge pressure piling up in the marriage hall, I gave up. I rushed and took the hands of the couple and walked them to the stage to lighten up the occasion.

Uff, major part was over, let me rest, I thought. "What? The ride has just begun, rest is 2 more sleepless days away", said the following events.

Welcoming guests; introducing people; getting introduced; food arrangements; drinks for people; drinks for couple; introducing the couple; pick ups and drops; arranging accomodation; medication for old people; managing the photographers; buying things for the marriage process; securing the valuables; checking the dining; tipping the drinkers; photo session with relatives/family and friends; preparing thank you cards; distributing sweets; convincing some; pleasing some; glancing some; calming down the silly fights; yeah all were tried for over 1000 people.

..the head count was hitting 1500; and the night was still young; we were all over the place; everyone did everything; all plans went for a toss; "Plans are made to be broken?"; we just had to go with the flow; neither could we pause it or streamline it; yeah, just gone with the flow.

I was spinning like a wheel of a car cruising in the speed of 120 kmph. My heart never pumped the blood so hard ever; My nerves played drums in my face; I never drank the air that much ever; I was sweating to resolve the water scarcity; I felt like I was thrown into a Tsunami and struggled to catch my breath. Thanks to Chakku, Sujai, Gopi and Arumugam who accompanied me in this ride. Without them, I would have been left without an Oxygen.

I remembered myself snoozing when driving back to my home after sending off the last guest who came for the marriage. I tried to keep myself awake from the 3 sleepless nights, but couldn't, I almost fell off from the bike. Thank God, my home was not far. I somehow managed reached the home. I felt like a drunkard; I blabbered something; my vision blurred; head spun; swimmed to the bed; and crashed like a baby; Yes, I truly felt so. It was at that time, I slept like a baby.

Yes, I slept like a baby. Do babies snore?... I did. I heard someone asking "What happened to the plan?"

Cartoon characters plan was swayed away due to the lack of professionals.
Face painters plan was washed away by traditional humans.
Magician plan disappeared due to the afford-ability.
Ramp walk plan was ruled out since we didn't even have time to run.
Slideshow plan worked, but the old memories were never in the picture.
Wish speech recording plan was a victim of the disease "Busy".
A script to carve a movie was dropped due to the lack of plan.

In my deep sleep, from somewhere inside the well, I heard again "What happened to the plan?". I wanted to say "It is all still alive... in the DREAMS", but... I just continued to sleep like a baby.

Dear Darling Uncle

"Who is with Tamilarasi?", the doctor called.

I stood in front of the Doctor with a curious and nervous face. I was alone, looking after my sister in the labor ward. Everyone has just left the hospital to refresh themselves after waiting for the doctor's response for the whole night yesterday. 

"We need to do a Cesarean to your sister immediately, since the blood pressure is not coming down and we cannot delay anymore, so we want your signature to start the operation.", the doctor said.

That is it, all my fear, nervousness and tension has took a panic face and my sweat was demonstrating that to everyone. 

"...but Doctor, you said that it will take at least a day to decide on the operation, why all of a sudden..." I asked.

"It will become critical if we leave it for later, due to the high BP", firm was the doctor's voice.

At once, I called Vasanth (my Brother-in-law), no response. Called Dad, no response. Arggghhhh!! They might be driving?

"Karikalan, can you please sign? this is urgent", the doctor was impatient. I have no choice, I signed and looked at my sister by hiding all my fear and panic with a pathetic smile and thumbs up, thank God, she did not notice the shiver in my hands, phew.

Few minutes later, Tamil was wheeling towards the operation theater. Vasanth made it on time to hold Tamil's hands before the operation, that is all she wished for. We were asked to wait outside the operation theater. It was a wait with lots of tension, nervousness, fear, anxiety, expectation, joy... ufff, a real storm of mixed emotions. 

I could not be idle; walked here and there; bit my lips; called friends without knowing what to say; smiled ridiculously at the people in the waiting room; just wanted to pretend that I am not tensed; so filled my hands in my trouser pockets; felt something, something inside my pocket.  What is it?  What is there in my pocket, a paper? Must be some forgotten bills? I took that out and opened it... it was a letter... yes, letter... and it read...

My dear darling uncle,

I am doing great in here inside my mom with all of your love and care. I know you are a bit tensed now, roaming like a restless cat outside the operation theatre awaiting my arrival. Don't you worry uncle, I am doing great and I will step into this world with a good health. I know my words won't give you complete peace, but at least you will be too busy to be tensed until you finish reading this letter.

I heard your bet many times on my gender. Yes, you are right, I am a girl, It is a little secret between you and me. Maybe I am a girl just to make you win in the bet and I am so happy about it. Here you go, victory is my first gift to you with a pride.

Few months later, if you wonder why I am staring at you without a blink and my jaw open when I hear your voice, it is because, a month ago I felt your hands touching my legs few times. I felt the love and care in that touch. I really wanted to see you at that very moment, but it felt like I won't be getting a ticket for an another month to step into your world. I just could not wait, so imagined your face and captured that in my mind. Hence, my stare is to compare if my imagination matches with the reality, so don't be bothered with my stare. 

I know my mom and you share a great love. I really envy that, but it is something I truly admire and would want to continue forever. I know you are worried that I might steal her from you, but not to worry uncle, I will ensure that her love is even more than before and I will be the stronger glue to stick you both together forever.

My mom told that you are the first grandson in your generation, so you got all the extreme love from our family which spoiled you to the core to be naughty and tease everyone in the family. How dare you? Well, uncle, those days are gone, here I come, the next gen kid, whiz kid, tough kid, funny kid, importantly a naughty kid to tease and challenge you back and steal all the love you got from our family. To start with, here is my open challenge, can you try to keep me calm when I am being tonsured and pierced for the first time? can you? If you lose, the penalty is Rs. 20k. Deal? I bet you cannot ;-).

My mom also told me that, you did not even know that you had a sister until you are 12 years old, due to your lion share on the love from our family. She for sure has missed lots of her brother care at the initial stage of her life. I know you also want to pay that back to her. Here I come, to give you a chance to compensate that. Utilise it to the maximum. I am Tamilarasi junior, the childhood photos of my mom is the proof for the same.

You complain a lot about the hall size of your house being too big, dont you? but uncle, don't worry, I will ensure that with my naughty and cute plays, I will make the hall look smaller. You better remodel your hall before I start speaking, if not, you will regret it for sure ;-). You have a great lawn as well, get your lazy butt up and keep the lawn well maintained and clean along with my Grand Dad for me to play. Otherwise, I will ensure that you will lose your sleep with my scream ;-).

My name, hmmm, what would be my name? would it be traditional, modern or funny? Is it something to be proud about? Well, I am not paranoid about it, because I have a feeling that my parents would select the name of your choice, so I am not even thinking about it since I know it would be a great name.

Uncle, remember, I am the first kid of my genration in our family and I will always hold that position with pride, as you are in your generation. This is the position which no one else, literally no one else, not even your kid can hold, Wahey! I am unique and will have a special place in all of your mind forever.

I really will miss my great grandma. I have heard great things about her from my mom, but nevermind, my mom looks like my great grandma, so I would see and feel her through my mom. I am sure she is watching me always from heaven and I am so grateful for the love she has left behind for our family.

My mom said, you are not very expressive emotionally with kids, but there is no escape from me. Together we both will have lots of fun when our parents are busy in their own world. I am sure you have lots of stories to say, games to teach, things to watch and moments to cherish. I know, you will turn the world around for me if I behave. I promise that I will be a good girl, since the world is not enough for me. Alternatively, I will reach out to my aunt Saranya to knock you down ;-).

Unlike other uncles and niece in our family, I know you would take special care of me and my future, with that, I will climb to heights, I will live my dreams and I will get all I wish for. I know, there will be lots of challenges in this life, and being a girl, many will try to break me, but I know you will be at my side to support me in all good and bad times. I will just enjoy what I am doing and will find my purpose and passion to have a great life. 

I know my parents would be sweating their blood out to set a great future for me, but honestly, my future would be incomplete without your presence. 

Just few more minutes away to meet you uncle, see you in a moment.

With lots of Love,
Your niece.

I was dumbstruck. I looked around. Read the letter again. I ran to Saranya to show the letter with an excitement beyond imagination. A loud and firm voice distracted my sprint, 

"Tamilarasi, delivered a baby girl, both mom and kid are doing fine, relatives can see the kid now", the voice of the doctor.

Everyone of us were jumping in joy. I was jumping around to take a first look at my niece, capturing every one's reaction and my niece's encounter with my relatives around. She was so cute, like a pink full moon.  it was a magical moment. After few minutes, she was taken back to the ICU. I called and informed my relatives and friends about the occasion. It took some time for me to come back to normal. ...hmmm.. wait.. I forgot something, what is it? 

Aaang! the letter, letter from my niece which I wanted to show to Saranya. Where is it? in the trouser pocket? no, in the shirt pocket? no, gave it to someone? no, fell somewhere? no. Where is it? did I leave it in ICU? no, where the hell is it? 

Would anyone believe me if I say that my niece wrote a letter to me even before she was born? or would they just call me a day dreamer? or maybe it is a day dream? 

Patriotism misunderstood

10000 years old history; 3.3 million square kilo meters; 7600 km of Coastline; 6 major religions; 22 major languages; 845 dialects; 1.3 billion people; 7 major rivers; 28 states; 7 union territories; Taj Mahal; Poweful democracy; Founders of chess; ...hmm, the list never ends, and we call her Mother India.
With a stiff pose, my mind filled with heart, heart filled with soul, soul filled with pride, with a shiver in the body, I grew up as a proud Indian.

Amal, Jose, Antonio and few of my friends have witnessed me with a loud voice, wide opened eyes and an arrogant attitude to fuel up the defense in me to shield my country when some loop holes and flaws have been pointed out about my country, culture and people.
As the saying goes "A person who flaws your country, should not be spared even if your mother orders to do so", Hoo Ha! my soul shivered and my mind said, I am patriotic.

I like Netaji and love Gandhiji, hence I am angry at them for not owing me a chance to be part of the freedom fight. With that fire, I ran into a tattoo shop in Germany and printed "Jai Hind" to celebrate the Independence Day.
When there is no pain, there is no gain; a patriot does not know the pain. Long live India.

Infinite time has been clocked with and without the company of Moon and Sun, by arguing over the problems; the creators; the leaders; the politicians; the drainage; the system; the law; the changes; the society; the root cause; the remedy; Yes, argued until our throat gave up on us and went on inventing an another remedy for thirst.
Yeah! we are all children of Mother India, and we are all loyal to her. Vande Mataram.

These were my thoughts on patriotism. hmmm... I am NUTS, am I not? Though I did not do these deliberately, I was deceived to think that this is what is patriotism is all about, but as the time ticked along, mentors and friends made me realise that I was pretty much screwed. For god sake, yeah, they made me realise...

stiffening the posture for the national anthem; respecting the flag than your life; knowing history and geography about your nation; arguing over the national issues; not standing the constructive criticism about the nation; switching to defensive mode and attacking the person who criticises it; tattooing patriotic slogans in the body; shooting up the patro-meter on an Indo-Pak cricket game or when a terror attack in the state;

...just these won't make one patriotic. Since I misunderstood the meaning of the patriotism, yes, I was screwed.

Abdullah, a ticket checker in the train fined us for a missing ticket for a luggage, his politeness and respect shattered me.
Vellaiyappan, a neighbouring farmer, his dedication and mentoring to the next generation inspired me.
Shankar, my colleague in Pune, his commitment and sincerity shook me.
Sivakumar, owner of a snack shop, his straight forwardness and passionate attitude impressed me.
(I just chose few examples in a long list, if I keep listing, I bet the list will beat the Schindler's list ;-)).

All of these patriots do not know either the history or details about India. They do not know how and who delivered India. Some, do not even know the complete national anthem or the meaning of it. However, they do their duty without fail with the right attitude without compromising for anyone or anything. They might not be aware that they are lifting the country up with their actions, but in reality, they are.

They ran through me, and stamped hard in my mind and made me realise that patriotism does not need a mass motive, it does not need a complicated effort. Small things and actions taken every day with a right attitude and motive to do good itself will qualify as patriotism. Hence, every day has to be celebrated as an Independence day, not just August 15th. Therefore, patriotism is not something scenic or fashionable, but a humble act involving struggle for what we believe is right. The struggle could be in any form, it could be in,

Performing our duties correctly;
Being honest about everything in any situation;
Actions to make a difference in the society;
Voicing against the crime and corruption;
Participation and contribution to the system;
Care for the people around you;
Respecting the countrymen and the opponents;
Accepting the criticism and acting necessarily to rectify it.

I witnessed the law acting in a light speed to enforce the rules on flag handling, evolving the national anthem, posturing for the national anthem etc. I cannot explain this in any other words than "joke", hence the fun is unlimited. It is a "joke" since the government fails to realise that the patriotism is a feeling and not a knowledge or habit. It needs to be nurtured in the citizens and not forced. As we all know, anything forced in us will be killed sooner than a day.

There are plenty of silly stinking political games played in the country by the people who only cares about themselves and not their countrymen. However, I realised that the love for the country is different from the love for the government. We have to bear with lots of non-sense with the government's lack of vision, planning and lack of common sense, but a patriot should still perform his/her duty correctly to bring up the society and the nation.

Jai Hind

The Fractured Match

August 18th 2009, 5:30 am.

Wake him up! Wake him up! it is getting late, his friends might be waiting. He alarmed his wife.

Let him sleep for a while, he came late last night from work and it is just 5:30 am. His wife replied.

30 mins later.

Ey, wake him up! it is late. You are spoiling him with so much care, he needs to learn to get up early. Wake him up, otherwise he is going to be very late. It is already late enough, come on, wake him up. He yelled at his wife again.

vrrrruuuuuummmmmmm!! their car was ignited outside their house. virrurruuummmm!! they heard the rise of the engine louder again. The couple was not sure who is in the car. His wife thought, it was their son who is already leaving, but he thought otherwise, since he was confident that his son is a lazy bumb and won't get up that early from bed ;-), so he came running to see who is in the car, but they could only see the half torn soul of their son's shoe on the floor after the car's smoke cleared off.

I was driving the car in a high speed (only because, it was early morning and no one was on the road), to attend the morning session started for a cause, with passion, with hopes, with dreams. It was going on for past 2 weeks, and all this is for the D-Day, which was just 3 days away.

Yes, the CRICKET match ;-).

It was scheduled between mine and an another company in Coimbatore. My team is very skilled, however they needed lots of practice to get back to their form. We had chosen the captain and coaches in a democratic way (my guys might disagree ;-)), since we took this match seriously. The opponents were very skilled and threatened us with their class performance in the friendly warm up game played a week ago.

I reached the ground, joined the team in the warm up session. I started to give instructions to the team to warm up and keep fit in the practice session, since the team cannot afford any injuries (we were already less in numbers). So I was very cautious about the health and fitness of the team in the practice session. Yes, I have been appointed as a coach.

Where is Gopi and Boopi? I asked Nissar.

Nissar is our captain cum batting coach, who was not very fit on that day, he was running a fever, maybe he wanted to dodge the warm up session? ;-). Gopi is our fielding coach.

They are sleeping, they won't make it. Nissar answered.

Whhoops, what a let down after all these build up ;-). I said we are already less in numbers. Oh! probably Gopi and Boopi thought, staying in bed is the best way to stay out of injuries ;-). Whhooa! great idea, but what about the practice? hmmm, I think bed is their ground where they will practice, since they are good enough to play bed games (Strictly no naughty thoughts ;-)).

Warm up done, practice started. I was bowling for Chakku. Nissar, Sujai and Dilip were fielding. 2 overs done, it was Nissar's turn to bat. I got a call from my aunt (who was aggressively searching a girl for me after I gave a go ahead for the marriage), after 2 minutes the practice resumed. Everything was going smooth, everyone were involved, everyone were focusing on the practice, everyone were enjoying...

....until that incident happened, yes the incident which shattered our dreams, the incident which shocked everyone, the incident which canceled the scheduled match, the incident which costed the unaffordable.

I ran to cover Sujai, who was fielding Nissar's drive towards mid off; The ball was heading very slowly to the boundary; I did not expect Sujai to miss it; so I slowed down, but I was wrong, Sujai missed it; I picked up the speed again to block the ball; My focus was only on the ball; I ran faster; I did not see the surprise hump on the floor; I stepped on it... the next thing I knew was... I was in the air and landing towards the ground at 68 kg per feet; I tried to position myself to be safe, but failed; my left hand landed in an uneven surface and my 68 kg landed on it.

"Kduk" was the sound I heard; there was a slight pain; I was forced to face the sky, showing my back to the earth; I could not move my hand; I immediately knew that I fractured my bone and the match scheduled in 3 days ;-(.

Watch out for the posts on the "after fracture" experience ;-).

The Plan

The light necklace around our house were blinking with happiness and added to the glow; the entrance gates opened it's arms to welcome the guests storming in; our lawn was filled with chillness after a smart haircut to cool down the heat poured in from it's day buddy; the dad made pond was juggling their little treasures to jolly up the mood; the way to the portico was filled with chairs which politely said "relax" in their foreheads; the plants were expressing their pleasure by nodding heavily; Our house was showing off with the recently done two layer make up; garbage kicked out, so that more can be made again; Whiskey and Rummy (pet dogs) were missing in the scene; "I am busy, I am busy" prided our house which attracted the strangers passing by;

Stepping into the hall made me feel that I was in the middle of the ocean, ocean of people, people with love, lots of love;

Everyone busy chatting about the occasion; some thought loud about their childh(g)ood days, some exaggerated; some started their history, some wanted to make one; some teased, some looked away; many laughed, few tried to; some in the loo, few in the other loo; some played cards, some watching them; some dum sharads, some anthaksharis; some sung, some screamed; ladies cooking, gents eating; kids running around, some grown too; some watched TV, few ignored; some were loud, some were quiet; teasing comments, fake angers, naughty jokes, lousy histories, future predictions, applauds, kisses, hugs, waaah!

Lots of love around, overwhelming it was; Feels like a gigantic Mexican wave was right on to drown me for good.

I know you are wondering, "what are all these for?"

mmmhummmm... let me fix my throat before I speak, this was all for one thing, yes, the one thing our family was waiting and dreaming for, the first marriage in our whole family in my generation, YES, a long awaited one... MY SISTER's WEDDING.

Ofcourse, we wanted to make this occasion a memorable experience for our whole family. Hence, the master plan was devised, Ho Kay! (as our famous comedian Vadivelu says).

Dad, Mom, Tamil, Vasanth and Myself were working out different possibilities, more possibilities than when we chess. The plan, we mentioned it at least once whenever we spoke, we slept with it (no naughty thoughts ;-) ), we dreamt about it, we woke up with it, simply we were breathing it, yeah, THE PLAN.

Cartoon characters around kicking the giggles in the hall.
Face painters to hide guest's real colors.
Masks to see our funny face at least once in a while.
Magician who surprises the guests with... well you know.
Ramp walk of the next in queue brides, grooms kids.
Slide show of family photos to help our guests digest their dinner.
Wish speech of our guests in a video.
A Script guides the video recording to carve a movie out of it.
Wish book, signed by the guests, which will seat in the album next to their photos.
..and delicious food, comfortable stay, glittering decorations, breezing travel etc.

Grandpa, Dad, Mom, Laxmi aunty, Easwari aunty at the reception.
Panneer and Thangaraj uncle taking care of the procedures and formalities.
Natraj and Nagaraj uncle at dining. Yeah, they love food ;-).
Thilaga aunty to ensure guests attendance with a click.
Chakku to take care of the stay and travel with the help of Sujai and Gopi.
Myself to take care of the bride and groom, stage plans, greet, welcome all the guests and to manage the above activities planned.

Now, we are all set, armed and equipped. Ready to rock and impress our guests and to passionately deliver the mission "Wow, what an experience". We were all confident that we can execute the plans above smoothly without a flaw and make this occasion a memorable one. After all, it is just our relatives, we have arranged everything and we have a huge experience in our bag.

...but, but, but, the reality had a different answer for our plan.

Have a break, Have a kit kat. Before the reality jumps on you ;-).

Kari invites...

Bro! When are you going to do it?

It was Tamil, who sounded excited, eager and anxious. I heard her heart through her voice. One should be a very holy person in his/her previous life to see the behavior of excited Tamil ;-). Well, it is always good to see a kid wobbling around all the way when she learns to talk and walk, isn't it?.

The days are racing with each other, when are you going to do it? you are pushing things to the last minute and going to lose the race with the time.

It was Tamil again, who got fed up of asking the same question again and again (not even .1% of the times she spoke to her new friend over the phone ;-)). I had to appreciate NOKIA's QA team for making such a withstanding product. There were also rumours that due to the high revenue the Indian government got through the calls made by lovers, they are planning to launch a sub-ministry called "Love all" ministry ;-).

Dey, have you got the content ready? are you going to print it or not? Do whatever you want, I do not know what you are thinking. I am not going to say it again, then it is your wish.

She was furiously serious and seriously furious this time.

Well, all the emotions were pitched on me for one thing... wedding invitation. Recently we have fixed a boy for Tamil to be her life partner (whether the boy is in a fix or not, only the Oracle can answer ;-)). My Great Great Grandfather dictated that, only the bride's parents should print the wedding invitation. Now a days, people do not even remember their grand father's name, ha, their words? yeah, it is in the bin. Well, I am printing one to invite my friends for my sister's wedding, ahrrr.. my first kid's wedding. So, G.G.Grand pa, I am not breaking the custom ha? so bless us from heaven.

Why should I delay it? if I can get a nice concept to pour in the card. It takes time, a long time. Should I be usual or casual, sentimental or emotional, responsible or irresponsible; I told you right, it takes time. But, at last, One fine night, I got it.

The clock in my house was close to finish it's day's task; The sofa yielded it's physic to hold me; after lots of sentimentally usual drafts torn and binned, I started to tear my hair (believe me, I do not have much left;-)); closed my eyes to search for some light; tic tic tic, the clock kept me awake; it was at that right moment, I heard someone humming a hit song; very mild; very casual; not organized; like a freak trying to spoil the music; loud laughter; heard some footsteps; I tried to focus, my eyes were still closed; thig thig thig thig; I heard someone running; suddenly I felt the sofa was bulging next to me to hold someone; who was it; I opened my eyes slowly; Shreeeekkkkk!! my heart jumped out of the vessel; my eyes were opened to the boundaries; my blood was pumping hard; and it was hot; shivering and speechless I was; I do not remember us having a mirror next to me.

Yeah, I saw myself sitting next to me; crazy eh?; but, my clone was different (was wondering if he was a clone or a clown ;-)); relaxed; agile; enthusiastic; humming; in a jolly mood; just an opposite of me; the outlook and the behavior says it all; I was staring at him for a long time and he did not seem to care; wanted to scream, could not; did not know what to do; it took time for me to recognize that he is a jolly side of me; Yo, dude whatz the time? he asked; I looked at the clock, it was 12:40 am; when I turned to answer him, he was already using my laptop; I was still shivering and nervous; My eye lids became heavy; I glanced at the time again, it was 1:30 am; by the time I turned, my clone was not there; I looked for him everywhere; he was gone; I looked at the laptop, the cursor was blinking at the end of the following content in the Textpad,

2008 B.M.V.

Mom: Tamil, who do you like in our family? Dad, Me or Kari?
Tamil: Dad and Mom are my eyes, my brother is my heart.
Dad: How can you be without us after marriage?
Tamil: I hate to think about that, I will never get married, I will never leave you, mom or Kari.
Mom and Dad: (concerned).

2008 A.M.V.

Mom: Tamil, who do you like in our family? Dad, Me or Kari?
Tamil: (Singing duet with Vasanth... in her dreams).
Dad: Tamil, answer mom, she is waiting for your answer.
Tamil: ufff! I heard this 1000 times, ask something else Mom.
Dad: How can you be without us after marriage?
Tamil: Vasanth will take care of me, God! why the days are not moving faster?
Mom and Dad: (still concerned, now about Vasanth).

Well, I too am concerned about Vasanth, after all he is a huMAN race. When Vasanth visited the worry factor and asked me what to do? what to do?, I boosted his confidence by making him aware that my dear ones are around to save him. Only then he agreed for the life time deal on Dec. 5th 2008 at 6 am in Ponmani Marriage Hall, Coimbatore. So, friends, I know your wishes are always with us, but ensure your presence to at least introduce yourself to Vasanth so he feels comfortable to call you when he is in Tamil trouble.

Vasanth's well wisher,
Kari...

B.M.V. = Before Meeting Vasanth.
A.M.V. = After Meeting Vasanth.

Confused; angry; furious; happy; teased; let down; funny; why did I push Kari to get the invitation ready; It was Tamil who was having mixed feelings.



Bro, are you really going to print this in the invitation? She asked. Without a doubt I said (I just said it but...).

...but I cannot let my kid down at any cost, can I?, a week later, Tamil had a look at the invitation shown in the image, the first printed copy. When she finished reading it, her eyes were filled with tears of sentiments and joy.

So friends, please be there to make Vasanth comfortable by being on his side.

Voluntary Madness

Here goes a successor of Alien vs Me.

...yeah the truth tastes like a beer, yuk, not tasty ha ;-). So, here is how the war was fought between me and Mr. Alcohol.

Drunkard sitter appointed, name is Jose, Don Jose. He was very generous to do this job without any compensation, no compensation? you may shout, yeah Jose is new to this job ;-).

I am onto a mission, lead me to do something strange, something dangerous, something which changed my life entirely... alright, alright, I am partly lying ;-).

Jose is one of the few from my trust planet, but he lived in (earth) Stratford. Did he promise that he will look after me if I go crazy? do not ask me ;-). I thought Jose never knew who fear was, until he invited Cristina (our friend) to this adventure.

The year was 2003; The day was fixed, friday; dinner was ready, curry; beverages were rolled, now I realised that Jose invited some more to the party - beer, whisky, wine and champagne.

Heard "Ding... Dong..." 8 times, yeah, it was 8 pm; evening swallowed half of it's life; central line threw me and Jose in Stratford; prawn puris, some rotis, butter chicken and jalfrezi, costed 30 pounds; Stratford bus station, shopping mall, McDonalds, KFC, curry house, college, kebab shop, a big Sainsbury... hmmm yeah Jose's flat is bit of a walk. We marched, Jose was like a jet, I was like a duck.

"Hey Kari! let us not do this today", a voice boat cruised through me. It was familiar, yeah, it was mine. "aahh, come on, do not look back, be a real man", yeah, you are right, me again ;-).

When I gathered myself up, it was warm, heard the door closing behind me, we were inside Jose's flat. Jose visited his kitchen to make it up (he loves his kitchen ;-)), the sofa was soft, I innaugrated Channel 4.

Quick it was, first sip of the whisky passed through my throat and then spine; thirsty I was for ages, that is how I felt; beer, wine, whisky and champaign; it continued to flow; I continued to drown; 3 pegs bottoms up; zhhoom... 30 minutes passed; heavy was my head; crossed were my eyes; there were Jose triplets, Cristina clones; I was floating & blabbering; Jose tried to control me; both Cristinas were not in the room; think I was swearing, Jose was red, furious; did I care? ha ha, did not want to; let me stand up, no let me walk; my steps were going deep down in the valley; am I under the water?; did someone click slow motion?; let me get on the table, success.. wahey; tune.. do you hear that, la la la.. let me dance; danda nakka.. danda nakka... very traditional; kicked the bottles, what? yes it broke; Whoops! do you know what I did? smile, laugh, giggle.. that is all I could do; the liquor and food spilled on the mattress; one Cris shouted at me; I laughed; 2 Joses scolded me; I laughed; 3rd Jose said, get out of my flat, he was holding my shirt and dragged me out of his flat, I accidentally banged into the TV, the TV went off....

Jose threw the remote on the sofa and said "Hey Kari, come on let us start the party!".

I forgot to blink, blrblrblrblr!?!? shook my head, uhhhh What!? ufff, it took sometime to sense the truth, yeah I was dreaming and I was paranoid.

A cute spanish accented voice, "Hey Kari, are you alright?", it was Cristina.

I am ok, let us start, I said. Naah! Let us drink first, Jose said.

this time, it was real. Becks, Screw Driver, Red wine and a home made whisky were wramp walking on the table. "get.. set.." GOOOOOOO!!! the alien entered my blood territory.

Slowly, burnt my taste buds, throat, lungs. I felt warm somewhere deep down in my stomache
2 rounds of becks, tried touching my nose... perfect.
a line of screw driver, tried touching my fingers, pefect than ever.
2 squares of wine, looked around... could not see Jose's twin, you can guess ;-).
a glowblet of glaalss of whhikksy... staaedy I ma, you think I am drunk ?

no way... let me prove it.
Straight line drawn in the hall; hand in the air positioned to my shoulder, like a flight; Forward March.. left & right.. left & right.. no flaws, a trained soldier.
Nose game again... both of my big fingers were bang on the nose target. Ouch!

Really, I was alright, my head was a bit heavy. Well, I spoke less fluently, yes it was late. Wish me, Jose and Cris shared the same mother toungue.

Surprise, Surprise for Jose, his eyes were wide open, yeah, he forgot to blink, ha.
"You are a strong man Kari", spilled Jose.
Laugh... it was Cris.

yeah, I didn't get drunk, hmmm, maybe the consciousness killed the flavour, maybe it is meant to be ;-). Who knows.. my dream might have come true, thank God for keeping Jose still in my planet ;-).

Lights off, I fell on the sofa, what an attempt, not the one to be proud about, ahhh!?!? especially after seeing what alcohol can do, I dared to give a try, faaah... yeah, not the one to be proud about, but my stand never changed, yeah unbeaten in the war with this alien ;-). I closed my eyes, did I snore ;-).

The next morning, Thirsty, first thing I felt; Water, first thing I wanted. Head was heavy and the pain was mild; I was stinking bitter; yes I was going through a famous feeling called "Hang over".

I switched on the TV and it said...
Drunkenness is nothing but a voluntary madness.
..
..
Sorry? Did you ask whether I kissed a... cigarette? ;-).